Remakes

An interesting movie trend reached a peak last year: the remake in disguise.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens essentially remade Star Wars: A New Hope.

Creed was a remake of Rocky.

Mad Max was a second go at Mad Max 1.

Jurassic World was a pretty faithful remake of Jurassic Park.

And of course, Spectre was a remake of every Bond film ever made.

And these were five of the biggest films of the year, so apparently no one noticed, or if they did, they didn’t mind. In fact, most  were also well reviewed, so even film critics, who you might expect to be disappointed in the lack of originality on display, didn’t have a problem with it.

But despite all those quotes about ‘talent borrows, genius steals’, the point of using the work of others to inform your own is that something new gets created, not something that is basically the source material under another name. Otherwise what’s to admire? Where is the process of creation? If the greatest twist in movies is that Darth Vader was Luke Skywalker’s father then using a virtually identical twist 34 years later is surely just lazy.

When I was at advertising college the biggest sin was to produce something that had already been done, even if you were unaware that it had already been done. This continued in my working career when people (myself very much included) would point out even tenuous similarities to other, often obscure, campaigns. And there was plenty of sense in that: the benefits of originality (your work standing out more; its freshness being more stimulating and memorable) are obvious.

But if people don’t care that much for originality, and even enjoy the kind of familiar tropes a remake provides, should we always seek to provide it in advertising? And what would happen if we remade great ads?

Pros:

Saves time and money.

Perpetuates ‘quality’ advertising.

No need to research.

Cons:

The original companies and agencies that made the ad may not exist, so you’d have a tough job with rights etc.

The original messages may no longer be relevant.

 

Doesn’t seem impossible.

What if Levi’s remade Creek or Drugstore? Could Guinness replicate Surfer? What about another go for Cog?

Well, just in case you think there’s merit in the idea, the real question is: can the quality of the original be maintained? Unfortunately, that’s almost impossible to answer for sure, but we do have at least one example where a brilliant original…

was remade with poor results:

So perhaps the reduction in quality of ad agency personnel over the last ten years has left us with people unable to replicate the brilliant originality of others, let alone come up with their own.

Or perhaps remakes, Hollywood or otherwise, are a bit depressing.

 

 



How many times does an angel fall? How many people lie instead of talking tall? He trod on sacred ground, he cried loud into the crowd (I’m a blackstar, I’m a blackstar, I’m not the weekend).

Albert Watson takes his own estate agent photos (nice flat).

Swear engine (thanks, T).

Cool random shit cut in half (thanks, S).

Swedish TV accidentally runs kids TV subtitles under political speeches (thanks, D).

David Bowie impersonates the greats with incredible accuracy:

Good (depressing) analysis of why the film business is in its current state (thanks, J).

The 90s in full effect:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNQ8juzdkbM



Please read this

I can’t add a comment that would improve this one iota, so I’m not going to.

Except for that one.



The false end of false recognition

Last week Amir Kassaei, CCO of DDB Worldwide, made the brave promise that we would see ‘less work from DDB agencies at some of the shows’.

I’m sorry I can’t be more definitive than that, but I only have Mr. Kassaei’s words to go on, and they’re frustratingly slight.

The overall suggestion of the article (entitled ‘The End Of False Recognition’, if any of you fancied sending something in to Private Eye’s Pseuds column) is that DDB is finally fed up with award schemes being overpopulated by ads created purely to win awards, so much so that YOU WILL SEE LESS WORK FROM DDB AGENCIES AT SOME OF THE SHOWS!

That there’s fightin’ talk, Goddammit!

You want more strong words? Brace yourself, ’cause here they come:

‘We have to stop the madness. Not only by talking about it, but by also doing something against it.’

But what?

‘We will be coming up with a plan to divest ourselves from the madness.’

YEEEAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhh…

Huh?

You’ll be coming up with a plan? And it’s going to do something as vague as divesting yourselves from the madness? So to avoid the crime of only talking about a solution, you’re going to talk about a solution?

Jesus.

Look, Mr. Kasseai, it’s not that hard. I can do it for you right now: just say that no DDB agency will enter work that has not originated from a proper client brief and run on a proper media plan. Then tell the ECDs of your agencies they’ll be fined a month’s salary if any ad is entered that does not fit those criteria. Done.

He continues: ‘There will be a lot of people out there who will hate us, who will point fingers at us and accuse us of being harmful to award shows and our industry in general.’ Sorry, Amir. No one’s going to give a monkey’s. You’ve made the most anodyne promise in the history of an industry littered with anodyne promises. My last fart will inspire more hatred.

Finally, he invokes Bill Bernbach: ‘But we are lucky. At DDB we have always had a foundation built by Bill Bernbach at our core to guide us to be brave. As Bill once said, “If you stand for something, you will always find some people for you and some people against you. If you stand for nothing, you will find nobody against you and nobody for you.” 

But you haven’t actually stood for anything. Bill also said ‘it isn’t a principle until it costs you money’. Let’s see you put some reality behind these words, then we’ll know whether we should stand with you or not.

People have been complaining about the gaming of awards shows for years. Coming out and saying you also oppose it is pretty uninspiring. Coming out and saying you’re going to do something about it without saying what that is seems like the kind of depressing flim-flam that Mr. Bernbach would have fired people for, especially when the alternative is so simple.

One last thing: an amusing ad placement next to the article…

Screen Shot 2016-01-16 at 18.58.50



Will you stay in our lovers’ story? If you stay you won’t be sorry, ’cause we believe in you. Soon you’ll grow, so take a chance with a couple of kooks hung up on the weekend.

Inside the Pantone factory (thanks, J):

Mistaken identity of DJ. Hilarity ensues.

RIP, The Dame (thanks, J).

Pixar’s movie references:

Snow dicks (thanks, J).



Got any good stories?

There’s a project afoot to collect the best advertising tales into a book that would be sold to benefit NABS.

If you have one, send it along.

This made me wonder exactly what mine might be…

Is it the time my art director thought it would be a good idea to send around that little film (they didn’t have Gifs in those days) of a woman sucking off a donkey (they didn’t have YouPorn in those days)? He accidentally hit ‘send all’, and before he knew it the offending film was winging its way to the inbox of every single person in Britain’s largest ad agency. He quickly realised what he’d done, explained it to me and I suggested he get on to IT ASAP. We knew there would be no chance of success, after all, emails just arrive the second they’re sent, don’t they? Well, IT was able to stop it in its tracks, and David Abbott and Peter Mead were spared the sight of Dobbin getting his rocks off.

Nah…

It might be the time we got taken to lunch along with another team, waited till the suit paying the bill was in the loo, then ordered the most expensive bottle of booze on the menu. We’d finished much of it by the time he’d come back, so he was absolutely entitled to react in an explosive and angry manner. Instead he took us all to the Trocadero, where we played arcade games for the rest of the afternoon.

Not that one either…

I think it was the time we were on a shoot that had so much money sloshing about that we were given a parting gift of $2000 and business class flights to anywhere in the world. I won’t name names, client or locations, but those were the days…



Nils

When I was at AMV there was a bloke whose job title was something like Head of the Studio. So he was in charge of the group of specialist designers who were tasked with improving the looks and layouts of our print advertising.

Reader, that bloke was Nils Leonard.

After a while he went off to Grey, when it was still the punchline to all jokes about British creative advertising, to (I think) be the CD on Hugo Boss where (I think) he made some ads with Sienna Miller.

After that happened, I kind of stopped keeping track, although I’d occasionally read that he was still at Grey and seemed to be getting promoted on a regular basis.

Then one day he became the ECD.

Grey had become a bit more interesting by that stage, presumably somewhat thanks to Nils. They were now housed in an interesting building in interesting Farringdon, and were no longer the butt of the industry’s jokes. (To be fair, I think lots of other agencies had simultaneously become much, much worse, accentuating the improvements Grey had made, but also demonstrating that Grey’s improvement wasn’t simply a case of a rising tide lifting all ships. Doing well in an overall climate of crapness is even harder; after all, you can’t show a reel of all the great stuff happening across town in order to inspire/guilt your client into commissioning similar work.)

And now, if my cursory flick through Campaign’s end-of-year round up in WH Smith is to be taken seriously, Nils is the cats pyjamas of London creativity. I was already aware that Grey was the UK’s most awarded agency at D&AD last year, or the year before, and that they’d won a couple of Cannes Grand Prix (OK, for a campaign I have a lot of problems with, but, hey, this is a nice post and this is the last time I’m going to mention how awful I think Life Paint is).

So Nils has done something very impressive: he took a dreary, crappy dinosaur and turned it into the hotshop of London, and one of the most awarded agencies in the world. And he did it through a pretty unusual route; I mean, how many studio designers do you know who have risen to be ECD, let alone taken a moribund agency and turned it round 180 degrees? I’m going to guess that the answer is none. In fact, I can’t remember anyone taking on such a derided agency and making this much of a success out of it. He’s now so respected he gets to write ‘call to arms’ articles for Campaign, and, gosh darn it, he writes them well.

So hats off to Nils, not just for getting to the top, but for doing it the hard way. And for being or not being a cock.



When the world is getting you down there’s nobody else to blame (way oh!), raise your middle finger to the sky and curse the weekend.

The storyboards Scorsese drew for a Roman epic when he was 11.

Movement in composition through the work of Kurosawa (thanks, J):

The best rappers of every year since rap started (thanks, K).

Great comedy writing advice (thanks, M).

A man with a bionic penis is about to lose his virginity to an award-winning dominatrix (thanks, J).

Michael Powell visits Scorsese and Coppola on the set of The King of Comedy (thanks, J2):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fdQRgCHod4

#LoveGod:

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First, do no harm.

Here’s a New Year’s resolution that advertising might want to make: stop deliberately annoying people.

I can take the odd shitty TV ad (actually more like 95% of them), the general dross on the radio, the invisible wallpaper that bulks up my magazines and newspapers, and the ugly messes that seem to count as posters these days. I don’t really notice much of that. I’d prefer it to be better but in my mind it’s basically neutral: a sea of beige blancmange, custom made to be ignored.

But the internet banners, the cack I have to sit through while waiting for movies to start, the perfume ads of heavy stock that I rip out of magazines because they stop me flicking through them… These are the limp sex pests of the industry: unwanted, unloved and unlikely to take no for an answer.

When people say they don’t like advertising I don’t think they mean most ads. Most ads are a colossal waste of money, but they’re not actively annoying. Of course, if every ad was a nailed-on crowd pleaser that inspired rapturous chat across the globe that would be wonderful, however I’m enough of a realist to know that would be a bit of a tall order.

No, we all know exactly what kind of advertising is hated because we all hate it, and yet many of us persist in polluting people’s lives with the very thing we abhor. Admit it: you’ve cursed the bastard corporation that has made you wait 5 or 15 seconds for your YouTube clip; you’ve muttered ‘Oh, not this one again’ as you’ve sat there in your £10 seat, waiting for the real entertainment to start; and you’ve taken a deep loathing to the words ‘sponsored post’ on your Instagram and Facebook feeds.

So why do we as an industry continue to put it out there? It’s as if many of us have decided that it’s worth being hated as long as you’re seen, and perhaps there are some benefits to that. We all know irritating campaigns that have managed to stick in our minds, possibly becoming liked over time by some weird kind of osmosis. But the vast majority of these kind of ads are simply a negative experience to be endured, and what does that really do for the brand that has paid so much to elicit these feelings, or the industry that creates more annoyance and unhappiness for the planet?

And you can’t avoid them like you can avoid Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2, or Jordan’s latest bestseller. You have to actively get rid of the things if you can, or sit there while your annoyance increases if you can’t. Imagine if your favourite chair came with a shitty chair that you had to keep beside it, or if you had to eat some rancid liver along with your perfect fish and chips. It would really make you hate whoever was behind such a weird set of circumstances.

So, inevitably, we have several varieties of adblocker. They don’t help with every interruption, but they do a fine and welcome job that shouldn’t need to be done. If the ads are bad enough to need blocking then surely they shouldn’t be produced in the first place. A vast chunk of the industry seems to be like a sweaty man with halitosis who can’t understand why the ladies are heading in the other direction. Actually, it’s worse than that: he knows why they run but he still goes out on the pull every night without taking a shower or changing his pants.

It’s absolutely barking, and the least we can do is stop putting out work that causes damage we’re fully aware of. Otherwise we seem both annoying and stupid – hardly a pair of adjectives anyone should deliberately set out to apply to themselves.

Happy New Year!



Najeneun ttasaroun inganjeogin yeoja Keopi hanjanui yeoyureul aneun pumgyeok inneun yeoja Bami omyeon simjangi tteugeowojineun yeoja Geureon banjeon inneun yeoja the weekend.

What did we get stuck in our rectums last year? (Thanks, T.)

The nice guys of OK Cupid (thanks, T).

Why the South Park creators are so fucking brilliant.

Good old Peep Show.

Movies before and after CGI (thanks, E).

The best title sequences of the year.

And the best cinematic shots of the year.

Happy New Year!