But wait till you read the copy:
Although I write a bit, I’m no more than 80% sure about how to deploy the colon and the semi-colon. However, I am 100% certain the above has got it really fucking wrong.
‘Joy is not being found relaxing in front of the television’? Do you mean that the abstract notion of ‘joy’ does not relax in front of the television, or do you mean that you can experience joy by not being found relaxing in front of the television? Either way, your opening sentence has the verbal equivalent of cerebral palsy. If you mean that you won’t find joy by relaxing in front of the television, I beg to differ. Try watching The Wire or The Sopranos or series two of Deadwood, or Weeds (I could go on). And if the BMW X1 is perfectly engineered to ‘satisfy every whim’ then I fear for the way in which it caters for sadomasochistic paedophiles.
Stop it. Please. YOU ARE MAKING ME HATE YOUR BRAND.